Humbling the Hagers

Jamie begged me for a year for an xbox.....he researched the used ones and looked for great reasons to have it and he really did his homework for a long time on it. SO last year we bought him a used one for fathers day...just the basic box no harddrive or even rinky dink memory card...and under the assumption that he would be renting games for a while.

SO we bought one...and we have really gotten our use out of it the last year. From watching Netflix to playing games with my brother in Korea...it really is our source of entertainment.

WELL tonight....it died. And as sad and pathetic as it is I was on the brink of tears. Jamie and I really don't have much. We have horrible credit and everything that we own has been given to us. (From our computer to our truck to every piece of furniture). Even though the xbox is a materialistic possession....I feel like it just brought me back to that humble place God puts us in every once in a while. We have gone through things like this before....we just want to be "normal" but things fail. We tried the second vehicle thing and failed BOTH times....as in both didn't work. We tried to buy a puppy, an investment in our "family" and he just bit our daughter. These things happen to us all the time. AND they are never rash decisions. They are always over thought and drawn out decisions that develope over months of time and end up failing.

SO the xbox was just a reminder of all those things.I had already been thinking earlier today about how my parents have to trade us vehicles for a while because with a new baby coming we just can't drive the truck anymore. My parents want to give us their van eventually but for now we are trading. Things like this.....they just make me so confused. Will we ever be on track and normal?

BUT in the midst of all of this I am thankful. I have the best kind of problem to have....materialistic and financial problems. I don't know why God keeps us in the red....but I am ok with it. I have a family that is healthy and I have friends and family that love me. I have a gorgeous and hilarious daughter. I have a wonderful and supportive husband. I also have the Lord and hope in life.

Jamie was pretty sad about the xbox but one of the first things he said to me after it happened was..."I love our lives" and he meant it. It might be hard sometimes but we appreciate things so much more and each other. I love that he is like that. Always finding positive and embracing what others may see as disheartening.

SO maybe one day we will own our own home, have two vehicles, be out of debt, and helping others as we see needs....but for now I am just going to embrace what God has in store for us and just remember that even the flowers in the fields are clothed. I am excited to see how God will use all of this for His glory.